Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
