I wanna bring you to show and tell
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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