people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
