can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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