guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
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