I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Randomize