Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
