i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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