...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
