we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
