I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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