Got a toothbrush?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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