I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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