I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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