So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
