She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
