someone get that fucking seahorse.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize