Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
