Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
