**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
