I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
