operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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