i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Randomize
