My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
We talked him into tasing himself.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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