I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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