Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
