You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize