Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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