she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize