Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
you have to choose: penises or morals?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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