Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Randomize