Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
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M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
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dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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