I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Drunk is a universal language darling
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
