Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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