____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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