It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
