Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
