I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
