Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
