If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Randomize