Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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