Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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