idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
