Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
