I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize