Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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