I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
