Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
