I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
