I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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