Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
