Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
